Patti Gibbons Art

Rightsizing Your Life: Simplifying Your Surroundings While Keeping What Matters by Ciji Ware is a wonderful book that I read while in the car to and from Kentucky. I met Ciji in Sausalito last spring, while escaping the troubles of New York and the torture of watching my daughter suffer from chemotherapy and radiation. My world had come tumbling down - again - and I needed a change of scenery. California here I come. Ciji is a close friend of my girlfriend Bardet, and I met her while we were evacuated from the apartments because the house next door was burning down. A year later, I am wandering through Barnes and Nobles, another great place I escape to when in times of turmoil (I have a funny story sometime to share about that)when Ciji's book screams at me from the shelf. I have been talking to Larry about the overabundance of "stuff" that we have in the house. We are both collectors and hoarders, (he more so that I) and it is out of control. I joked that the attic...

The political blog was a difficult one for me to write the other night, perhaps because I have never been comfortable discussing politics. One has to research and read through tons of information to get the real story and be able to have an intelligent conversation. I need another life time to do that, so most of my life I have tried to know enough to vote for the big players, and muddle through the rest. I have made an effort to do more homework on the matter, though I still feel very inept having any political debate. I will admit, it is an area I am weak in. But it is my responsibility to get more involved as I slowly carve out time for things that I never did...time for exercise, time for family, time for me, and time for doing my civic and public duties. Obama's speech did that for me and for so many others---jump started us. I talked with a lot of other people about this, and they too felt the excitement, the passion, and the inspiration from this young slight man on t...

I am using my laptop tonight as I started to install my new printer/scanner/fax machine this afternoon and my computer is pulled apart. I knew that I was in for a bit of an investment of time, but I needed to have a printer working again, so I bit the bullet and opened the box. It probably took me a half an hour to photograph the box set up (in case I have to repack it), carefully undo all the packing material, and carry a very heavy piece of machinery into the office. Unfortunately for that project, I had to leave it incomplete as I had a date to go to the local brewery for a party to watch Obama’s Acceptance Speech. I am still not sure what organization put on the party at Keegan Ale, but rumors of it being supported by Bard and Vassar College were floating around. I Googled it and found several links to the Obama/Biden website. I joined up with a great group of like minded friends and headed to the brewery. It felt odd to be doing this, as this is the first time in my life I...

I got up this morning barely able to walk, my thighs killing me. I wondered what I had done to merit such pain? Then I remembered going to the car wash, and waxing my car in 25 minutes. I was up and down like a monkey on that car, doing lots of crouching, popping up and down. I usually get these muscles exercised when I garden, as I tend to crouch when I weed which really strengthens the thighs. Only I have blown off my garden for a good part of August, like so many other things in my life. The last week of vacation is NOT the time for me to worry about what I have not done, rather rejoice in the time I have left, and enjoy it no matter what I am doing. I traveled across the river to show Kip some computer things, and to bring my mom flowers picked from the farmer's fields. Zinnia..lovely bright zinnias. On the way home I saw a herd of cows laying down in the pond cooling off. I pulled off the road, hopped out to take their photo, but by then the head cow had decided they we...

If you asked me what Buddhism is, I could not tell you much other than that I have a stone Buddha in my garden, and a few other buddhas and Indian goddesses in my house. My husband does yoga every morning, and I have gone back to yoga after a many year hiatus. This time I have gone back with a spiritual motive as well as a physical one and I am becoming addicted to this spiritual/observational/physical exercise. What has changed my life - and helped me cope with its intensities, is the core Buddhist concept of "Being Here and Now". As quoted by BUZZLE.COM "it is about leaving behind the reality created by the mind, and realizing the world as it is", a concept reiterated by Eckart Tolle. The past few days I have been diligently practicing being present- in the scenic romantic country drives I take about the county, lunch or dinner with a friend whom I love, working in my studio, working in the garden, going to market to purchase the day's goods, or a visit to m...

Larry and I had a lovely last day of vacation together yesterday. We slept in till 9:30-our bodies exhausted from the drive and lack of sleep over the past 10 days. I was graced with my period for the fourth time this summer, having it during each and every one of my vacations. Two of them it was on the drive home, which I suppose isn't so bad, save for the fact that I was in the car both times for HOURS miserably sick. After getting up, I emptied out one of my kitchen cabinets so that we can paint inside it later today, which included 2 shelves of cookbooks. Larry and I have whittled them down to one shelf now, and I have to find new homes for the ones I put aside. Many are outdated paperbacks, and a few are are vintage hardcover cookbooks. I will give Megan the ones she wants, and post the rest here in case there are any you all would want. (I still have another cabinet with some in it too!) I called Karen and headed over to her pool for an hour. I found myself deliriously...

A brief summary: Number 1: keep those potty blog comments coming. Potty talkers UNITE! Number 2: Thank you for bearing with ooey gooey family photos. Can't help it. After all, aren't we all works of art in progress? Number 3: Larry congratulated me on being a great back seat driver(notice he did NOT say front seat) driver. Which meant I was a tough one. No doubt--I have very high driving standards. I told him he drove fabulously 85-95% of the time. It was the othr 5%-15% that made me very nervous. (FYI 10%- the average of 2,000 miles= 200 miles that I had to worry about streaks in MY underwear!) Number 4: family time is priceless. Number 5: after almost 5 hours of Oprah and Eckert Tolle podcasts and lengthy discussions Larry summed it up in: 1. Everything changes 2. Everything is connected 3. Pay attention. I read in my Right Sizing Your Life book (by Ciji Ware) that if you do something 21 times in a row, it will become habit. So with the following words I will leave you: ...

No, it is not an A.A. Milne bedtime story. This is one of the occasions I am going to talk toilet talk, one of the favorite pastimes in my family. In fact, my sister-in-law wishes that one of us had warned her of our Adams Family style way of murmuring jokes and phrases about things that no one wants to hear EVER. And it seems to have passed down to the next generation. I have spent many hours while here holding my lovely little grandson. I comfort him so well that every time I cradle him, he graces me with long outrageous poo noises and diapers filled with gusto. My grand daughter has finally learned to poop on the potty. However, we have had some adventures and misadventures while in the mall. It is a long way to the potty when you have to GO NOW. Thankfully the elastic in her underwear is strong. That is because we have had to throw so many out that only the newer ones remain. She has made me laugh when she shows me her undies and proudly proclaims: "Mimi-there are NO st...

I had planned on writing this HOURS ago, but when I sat at the computer mid afternoon, in the warm room, I began to nod out. I promptly closed down the computer, and laid down for a while, though I did not sleep. I have a problem sleeping in strange places, just like I have a problem pooping when I am away from home. My body freaks out and all sorts of havoc can be wrecked. I have gotten much better over time, and the last few vacations I have left my bottle of Ambien and my Magnesium Sleep Aid (also good for keeping the bowels regular) at home. (too much information?!) Larry and I are sleeping in the downstairs dining room on an inflatable mattress. Each time Larry or I roll over or move, we sort of roll together and the bed bounces. I found that if I sleep really close to him, there is less "roll" to the bed. I like snuggling up to my husband if I am in the mood, but I really like to sleep on "my side" of the bed, especially in the summer. Way too hot!. Though th...

Last night we watched The Bucket List. I have it at home, and had been meaning to send it to my mother as she loves both actors in it. I wanted to watch it myself, but due to her illness, I have avoided it, and certainly was NOT going to send it to her. Last night I was ready - to watch it myself. As I age, I fear death less, and I am learning that it is more important to be defined by how I live my life than by the suffering I experience. My 24 year old daughter's cancer was a wake up call for me. Don't put off till tomorrow what you can do today. Live each day to its fullest. Fulfill your dreams. Dream big. Love the one you're with. Decide what is really important-the rest does not matter. I have already started a bucket list. One of the top things that I could do (I don't have money to do it all YET) was to buy a new fridge and stove (my old ones were falling apart and horrendous), then my convertible. Though I have not gone off to Europe, I managed to dri...

I consider myself and my daughter to be fairly intelligent people. But like all great thinkers, we have our own Achilles heel which humbles us, gives us a good laugh, and reinforces that we should not take ourselves too seriously. George Bush is a constant reminder of this, and when I see all the faux pas that the leader of our country makes, I don't feel so stupid. For example. Last night while eating dinner, we heard a big BOOM and all the lights went out. We ran around finding kids, candles, and lighters. After a while we wandered outside to see how many houses were in the dark, and I gazed into the night sky. "Look Alanna, look how glowing and red the moon is, how strange!" Megan looks at me, and says: "what moon?". I think that they are blind for not seeing it, then Megan says, "Are you looking at the big red ball on the electric lines that are for the planes?". I look again, and feel like a sheepish fool, and check to see how much wine we drank. ...

I am writing from a king sized bed in a Marriott in Charleston, West Virginia, surrounded by six pillows that prop me up. From the 16th floor I gaze out into a city shrouded in fog. I have sent Larry to get me coffee so that I can sip it in bed while I write. When he returns I watch him rearrange the entire room so that he can do his yoga. I laugh at him, with a twinge of jealousy that he has the drive to do yoga every morning of his life for the past five years. I then congratulate myself that I have been working out several times a week since January, in spite of my various physical challenges. The Internet is not free here, so I will write and upload it at Megan’s later. I am a bit miffed, as when I have traveled through the Northeast through Connecticut, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Maine and Canada, I always had free wireless at the other hotels I have stayed in. But the giant white bed graced with half a dozen pillows feels delightful, so I forgive them. Yesterdays 600...

I am going to post this slide show on the side of the my blog in the future. It will be a changing show of various work that I do, or that I love. Surrealism, political, humor, landscape, encaustic, and perhaps a bit of erotica thrown in here and there. Nothing to make me have to post one of those "blogger warning adult matter" banners. I am sure doing that alone would up my blog traffic, but a girl wants to be known for more than her erotica you know. You can click onto the image that you like on the slide show which brings you to the main site, where you can then click again on same photo, then on image again to bring you to a screen where you can view it larger etc. Just play and you will figure it out. It is a great free program, and easy to use. Type slide.com into your browser to use it for your My space, blogger, site, etc. Doing such art things helps center me and give me strength to do the more difficult jobs, and I also make positive things happen to counterb...

This has been a very difficult decision to make - remaining in New York for a bit longer. Dole leaves Saturday, we won't get to see him before he leaves for a year plus tour in Afghanistan. I won't be there for my daughter who is already fragile and falling apart. "Such is military life" I want to say to her, when she calls me crying on the phone about how sad it is that her son can't grow up with his father. But I know it isn't the right time for that and I am sure that thought has already crossed her mind many times. To put things in perspective I told her that technology has enabled her to talk with her husband in the war zone once a week; previous wars left women wondering for years where their men were. Still, that is of little comfort to her and I do my best to console her and promise that I will get there before school starts. We have some flexibility in time, but as the clock ticks, I feel the crunch and the anxiety of not-knowing. The only advant...

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times; it ws the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness; it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity; it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness; it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair; we had everything before us, we had nothing before us; we were all going directly to Heaven, we were all going the other way." Charles Dickens

“Will you come with me” he asked as he sidled himself up next to me as I was walking down the hall. “Where to?” I asked, trying to be funny and nice to this Uncle Fester looking man. “Into the bathroom” he mumbled. “Oh no, I can’t help you, I don’t know where the bathroom is here” I responded, wondering if he was lost and could not find the bathroom or his room. There are those seniors here who are disoriented or totally gone. The gentleman followed me into my mother’s room. I gently told him “you can’t use the bathroom here”. “LISTEN” he hissed, “do you want to do it or not?” That was a dialogue between me and a man in the nursing home. He was a resident, not a worker thankfully, but he threw me totally off guard. I looked at him and said “My mother is sick, you can’t come in here, and NO, I DON’T WANT TO DO IT!” I was stunned –twisted-shocked. This occurred right after walking into my mother’s room, seeing her on her side, unable to get up any more, no dignity left, bruised and sw...

I am a bit overwhelmed. In my art blog I mused how I don't know how I am going to get everything done that I need to before I go to Kentucky, and before school starts. I have an order to complete in 3 days, a show two days after school starts. I feel like the little trees in the sketch here, awash with water in high tide, lost in a huge ocean, and permanently bent from exposure to the elements. The trees mark the channel, and I understand that they are dug up every year and replaced as the elements eventually kill them. I on the other hand, must be like the Ever Ready Rabbit, and keep on going. I have to. There is no one to replace me, I live my life to recharge during low tide, a place of firmer ground and easier living. My mom is not eating and though conscious, seems to be in a twilight zone between life and death. The hard part is watching her linger till she makes the journey where she will rest her body and free her soul. My brother and sister were here, and we dis...

It has been an awfully long day, and I don't have much energy left. There are lots of issues with the nursing home going on, and though my mother is in bad shape, they over drugged her and put her into a near comatose state. And it goes on from there. I have spent some time with my brother and his wife, and we shared a few meals together, a few bottles of wine, and some laughter. We made the best of a stressful situation when we could. My sister is coming with her family tomorrow, and we will hopefully all meet to discuss what is going on. I still have more phone calls to make, but I have run out of time and energy to call people. I have even run out of spirit to write any more tonight. On a good note, here is my beautiful miracle family. Patti O Burnout

My head is pounding, my blood pressure is way up. I don't know if it is the stress or the need for the adjunctive medication that I stopped taking. My feet are still swelling, and my eyes have turned into a tidal pool of salty tears. I need a cocktail. You know, one of those martini and Valium cocktails that set you right down on your ass so that you feel the sorrow but you can't show the pain because though you can function, albeit a bit tipsy, you are numb on the inside. My mother is very ill, I was over at the nursing home last night after I got the phone call that she was in and out of a deep sleep all day. I had gone over the day before to visit and spent a few hours with her, and was startled at how grey her coloring was, and saw pain etched into her face. She managed a smile or two in our one sided conversation, and she added a few grunts to let me know she understood. But I did not think she was that close to dying, and I am not sure where in the process we stand. ...

(this blog copied from my MEGANAID blog which follows the progress of my daughter Megan, who served in Iraq and has leiomyosarcoma, a rare form of cancer) Megan is an amazing young woman. When I think of all that she has gone through I shudder. There is so much that I can not tell, and much that needs to be told.Out of respect for her I censor my writing. Some of the things she has had to endure from 18-24 has been ARMY boot camp (AUGH!) being a diesel mechanic in Iraq pregnancy in that country and army field medical care the birth and raising of a child w/out the father diagnosis of leiomyosarcoma other disorders/some of which are directly related to serving in a war And now a miracle baby conceived after chemo and radiation. For two months this baby has been trying to come into the world. Megan has been in and out of hospitals during this time and on two months of bed rest. Then today, on his due date, the midwife broke Megan's water, and Megan birthed Randall Crain Jr. into the ...

Blogger is having some major issues affecting my ability to post this blog and photographs for my art blog since last night. I feel like I am going through withdrawal, unable to communicate to my mostly silent audience. I know you are out there, my stat counter says you are, (I don’t know who you are for the most part----big brother doesn’t give me that info!) but knowing you ARE out there makes me feel connected to a network of people who find interest in my jumble of words and images. Of course by the time you are reading this all issues will be resolved, but in the meantime I feel very lonely typing away in Microsoft Word. I knew once I got back I would have to step back into the world of reality; messages from the nursing home about my mother, another appointment needed with the doctors there tomorrow morning. I know that my future holds some really tough times; such is life at my age. Friends pass, parents fade, and even my own child lives day to day not knowing what the fu...

(note: written 2 days ago…just uploading now!) We found a sweet public beach after breakfast yesterday, Rock Harbor, not far from Orleans. Parking is free, you don’t have to buy a beach pass, and there are plenty of charters available there if you like to go out fishing. The harbor beach is small, the water calm, and it has a jetty along side of it with large flat rocks where I sat and made a few sketches in watercolor. It was warm, peaceful, and surreal, with the trees poking up in the middle of the water. Some are permanently bent over, perhaps from a constant wind, or strong storms. During low tide, the same trees sit upon sand flats. Later on Carol and I walked a few miles along Nauset Beach, and my body is reminding me today how much more work it is to walk on the beach than on the smooth pavement of my neighborhood streets. Today is the Pan-American bike race, so we are hanging back a bit before we venture into Wellfleet or Provincetown. I hope to catch a few hours at the ...

This is the second time I have typed my blog. Somehow my laptop crashed; I suspect it was the updates that Vista was trying to download and it dumped my entire blog. Anyway, I am at the Sparrow in Orleans, one of my fave places that has wireless, where I sip on coffee, munch on a scone, and check my emails. I am in a bit topsy-turvy, as I had just returned from one trip, to come home for a day, work the entire day, then get ready to hop in the car again for another four days.As a result, I forgot my medications..and hope that my lack of blood pressure meds will be OK. Breathe Patti, breathe. The EOS had been consistently getting 33.5 MPG on long road trips, which was more than I expected. I bought my first quart of motor oil, synthetic European grade Penzoil which runs 7.00 a quart. No wonder an oil change on this car costs 75.00. Probably at least half of the cost is oil and filter! We are heading to the beach for a late afternoon stroll and swim if the weather holds out. Out o...