The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Generally I am a nice woman. A little zany, but fair, friendly, honest, kind, and wanting to be a good person. Then the hormones kick in or out (I am not sure which it is) and the switch gets thrown. Purring sweet kitten morphs to mama lion, ready to tear your face off if you cross her path. (it can happen to inanimate objects too).

I sense that men don't understand this unless they are schizophrenic, psychotic or have a mood disorder. They have NO CLUE what it is like to live in a body of raging bull hormones. In fact, I wish that EVERY man could feel a serious change in their estrogen levels, but I am afraid that there would be murders, even more wars started and massive episodes of road rage and cave man-like behaviors. Perhaps nature knew to give such hormonal spikes to women, for if they were given to men, the race would have ended in one generation.

For several days now, the wiring has been cut somewhere deep within the pathways of my neurotransmitters. Signals cross, patience is a word that does not exist in the P.A. Gibbons dictionary.

This morning I scared Larry, the G-team (my contractor friend Tom and his son), the lady in the bank, the lady in Stewarts, and the guys at the Subaru dealership. Karen could handle me, and besides, she understood.

I don't like being like this. I don't like terrorizing the world. I prefer to lock myself up for several days, but since I have to work and carry on with my normal life as if I were a normal person, there are bound to be episodes. The best thing is to stay away, and let me growl.

I am having more tests done, and probably more biopsies as the doctors can't figure out yet why I am having such a hard time and having such rapid episodes. . I can no longer take this every 14-21 days, and it is very hard to function on any level. I am ready to take any hormonal replacement they have to offer, but the first round they gave me has not worked. Whispers of hysterectomy have been in the wings...but I am not jumping the gun yet.

In the meantime, hang on for the ride baby...cause it's sure a wild one. For a few hours you are all safe..for the lion sleeps tonight-I hope.

Patti O Animal

Comments

annie kelleher said…
oooh patti - my sense is that a lot of your hormonal state is reflective of the world in which you work...
Judy Vars said…
You've got it bad baby. It's good no man can go to the world of women and hormones, can you imagine. It will get better eventually.

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