Today was a day of facing some things about my life. I cannot tell all here, but take my word, I am being challenged on many levels. Fortunately with hard hard work, my vantage point is a bit clearer now than it has been in the past, but it still a difficult journey.
In regards to the NY show, someone asked me if I was afraid of success. I know I am not afraid of failure, as I am secure in my feelings about my work, and low sales can be from a variety of factors (like the economy, the venue, the crowd) But success...that is another story. I really had to think about that.
If I was hugely successful, how would that change my life? I no longer can hold onto old misconceptions and messages drilled into my brain that I am not good enough? Old ghosts will have to be banished? I might have to let go of what is comfortable, even if not productive in my life's journey?
Thank you to those who commented, and to Ross who has made me an offer I can't refuse if I decide to accept it. It's like having my own cheerleaders.
I'll end with a few quotes that are relevant to me by Rudyard Kipling:
"If you can keep your wits about you while all others are losing theirs, and blaming you, the world will be yours and everything in it...."
"It's clever, but is it Art?"
"Never look backwards or you'll fall down the stairs."
and "Often and often afterwards, the beloved Aunt would ask me why I had never told anyone how I was being treated. Children tell little more than animals, for what comes to them they accept as eternally established. "
Patti O Adventurer