I was DETERMINED to make the summer solstice a fabulous day.
Even though I had gone to two parties last night, I made sure that I did not let my Irish/Lithuanian party self get out of hand. After all, I had big plans for today. I was not quite sure what they were or how they would turn out, but I knew that I wanted to be clear headed, and not suffering with a headache, or lack of sleep.
I started the day off with a yoga class called YOGA FOR BONES, based upon ancient yoga techniques combined with Feldenkrais to help one build strong healthy bones, essential for us peri and post menopausal women.
It was fabulous as always. I especially loved working with a partner, and doing activities like skipping and rolling--things which I have not done since I was a child. At one point Donna told me that I was having problems being in my body....which I had suspected all along, which gave me understanding as to why I also have problems balancing in yoga.
At the end of class, she played some ethereal meditative music by Wah. I am lying on the floor, and the tears start to pour out of my eyes. In a moment of rare and pure truth, I knew why I struggled being in my body. In the first 30 years of my life, as a victim of abuse, I learned how to leave my body so I could not feel the pain. I can go back to those memories, and remember so very clearly how I did that as if it were yesterday.
The tears I shed were for the child that I left behind, for the damaged child. But now I can let that go, and I will work to rejoin myself with my body once again.
I went home to Larry, with appreciation of a man who is kind and gentle, and spent the rest of the day shopping at the Farmer's Market, and then rode to my friend Karen's house to hang out by the pool.
She has a large built-in pool, surrounded by woods, which borders on the rail trail. We sipped Sam-Adams Summer Ale-so apropos for the day, and threw ourselves in the cool water. We later took the dog for a walk along the trail, picking our way through the woods avoiding the dreaded PI (poison ivy) dressed in bikini tops, our bottoms wrapped in old beach towels.
It was a fabulous day in the Catskills, and I gave thanks to the gifts and beauty of the day.
I made a humble dinner from greens from the garden, and a ratatouille quiche from the market, topped with a creamy garlic dressing made from young garlic cloves, plucked early from their bed. I am sipping on "faux champagne" from the Hudson Valley, a gift from Bardet, and my husband awaits me upstairs to finish watching a movie. I am so blessed to have all that I do.
To the Solstice, to love, to friendship, and beauty. To the earth, to the great creator of all that is.
Patti O Peace