I am a bit weepy. Perhaps it is because I am listening to such sad music, and I feel so poorly. Or maybe it sounds so sad because I am sad.
I made it through a day of work, but not without spending my early morning hours in the bathroom, as well as the remainder of the afternoon. I did not go to my workshop. Instead I had to go to bed. I am not sleeping, no food is staying for very long in my body. It is wearing me down, and who knows after yesterday's procedure how my hormones are reacting to the invasion of their home base.
A reader reassured me that I was not giving too much info, because as women, we need to be educated in order to make the best decisions about our bodies. Thank you my dear readers.
I have heard "hysterectomy" whispered by a few doctors I have talked to, and to me, that is far too invasive a procedure for an organ that does not have cancer. What I do have is hormones that are off the chart. I have suspected that for years, though it does, on occasion, have its merits. But at my age, I don't need such intense surges in my life, and they are creating more havoc than good. I am not ready to give up my uterus if there are other solutions to the problem. I have tried the natural hormone therapy; it did not work, so I am interested in the procedure called an endometrial ablation .
It is done outpatient, and is essentially an electrical current that destroys the built up lining of the uterus, and I can go back to work w/in a day or so, depending upon how I feel. So much better than having to traumatize the entire body with the removal of a major organ, no matter how tiny the bikini cut, or how they go about taking it out.
But I can't even THINK about that until I take care of my digestive issues. That has overshadowed everything. I suspect gall bladder..... at least that is what I feel deep down it is. Thursday's appointment can't come soon enough as it is affecting my life even more than my uterus. With so many in my family having either had problems or having had it removed, it looks like a good possibility.
It is hard as I am just not me any longer. I make it to work, and maybe can sit at the computer, but I find it impossible to have the energy to do the 10,000 things that I have and love to do.
And tomorrow's blog is about having to come to terms with accepting other's limitations and deciding who you can really count on in your life, what it is they can give and what they can't. Or maybe I shouldn't go there........
Patti O Poop
Image called Healing Hands which was a digital collage I did some time back. I make them as a print or a greeting card, and showed the piece last year in a show on cancer.