And it is Over

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The day arrived..the one that all kids and teachers look forward to-the last day of school.

It was rather anti-climatic for me. I am always excited, but there is an element of sadness each year. Saying goodbye to kids I love, to staff who have been my friends and my support for the year. I don't get to see many of them over the summer, and some never return. I spend a lot of time alone as many of my friends are working, and I am grateful for the phone calls asking me if I want to meet them for lunch. I am on austerity budget for the summer, but I can always find something I can afford on the menu.

Today I went through bouts of frustration, anger, and sadness. Tears came to my eyes a few times thinking about all of it, and when one of my co-workers stopped in who is very sick with cancer, I lost all control of my emotions. I had to turn and walk into my room as I did not want her to see me cry. It was too close to home for me, and I knew how sick she was.

I was wrapping my boss's farewell gifts up and I cried again. I will miss her.
I felt so empty, on this last day when I should be joyful.

I delivered work to a show that I am in this weekend, stopped at a party with Alanna, and then went to therapy.

The session was so heavy, that I ended up going BACK to the party I had left so that I could have a stiff drink. Being with people inevitably cheers me up, and after some time saying goodbye to my friends for the summer, I headed home to Larry who was waiting for his sushi date for the evening.

My first day off I have Alanna. It is OK as I have lots to put away that I brought home with me, and I will take care of myself and heal from the raw emotions of a rough week.

I have started a new blog which will be devoted to just art, though I have not posted to it yet, and this one will be reflections on life and other things. I love to write about both, and it seems fitting that each should have its own forum.

Here's to peepers and lightning bugs and warm summer night walks where I can look inside people's houses---and to art.

patti

PS Hey, where's the brandy????

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